So I've fallen into the whole "listing" trap that many bloggers fall into pretty regularly. But, since I'm not really a blogger, I'm simply a lazy cunt rag bitch, who tells people where to be... I can do whatever the fuck I want (and tell you what to fuckin' do too.)
Things I hate:
1.) Baby blogs. Get over it, you have a baby. I'm not annoyed that you choose to dote endlessly on another human being... Not much could be more loving. What I hate, is that you put every detail about your baby, your vagina, your husband's dick, etc. etc. on your damn blog! The icing on the cake is when you open up for comments, and don't like what people say about you and your damn baby (ahem...see previous post).
2.) The smell of burnt skin in january. Ok... I know that some people out there are getting ready to go on Spring Break in like, 5 weeks, and they want a beautiful tan by then. Fine, but would you PLEASE take a shower or use pleasant smelling lotion on yourself before you venture out into public. Otherwise you smell gross.
3.) Low Rider Trucks (not to be confused with El Caminos). I don't mean to make any racial generalizations here, but in general, when I see low riders, it's usually a white person listening to Tupac, with those shitty "no fear" stickers all over the back window. Uh... do you see any black people riding around in those pieces of shit? Hell no, because black people have taste! Get a clue, you white piece of trash.
4.)People who dance (even if only with their heads and necks) to their cell phone ring tone. No. You are not cool. I don't care if it's the theme from LoveBoat, or an old TLC song, or even the ring tone that came with your phone (you cheap bastard). Quit doing it!
5.) Overly Critical Bitchy People. Uh... wait. Nevermind
6.) Men still still sporting the "caesar" hair do. Remember Mel Gibson in "Hamlet"? Remember the crazy rush to the salon, as every young (and some not so young) man rushed to his stylist to imitate this horrible horrible trend? Well, I do. And I thought I had finally put those evil images out of my head until I saw not one, but two men OBVIOUSLY and INTENTIONALLY sporting the "caesar." Plus... what the fuck, it started after "Hamlet" so why is it called the "caesar"? Just another one of my beefs with this cut.
7.) People who shop at Wal-Mart. I know, I know... I'm one of them. But only out of necessity. You have no idea how many Lexus SUV's and Audi sports cars I see in the Wal-mart parking lot. "Maybe that's how they can afford those cars," you say? Well, if selling your soul to the devil affords you a nice new car, I'll be driving The Prot forever.
8.) Plus-size maxi pads. I just think they're dumb.
9.) ClearChannel. (I intentionally spelled it that way to avoid litigation... incase big brother is watching me). Want to hear famous people say, shit, bitch, fuck, cunt, tits, asshole, or finger bang? Well, don't listen to any of CC's stations, because you will hear only wholesome, premium, corporately sponsored dribble from everyone's mouth. Bullshit!
10.) NIN. Can we schedule some more dates please? I've only been waiting, like, 5 years. Thanks.
Posted by scurvylime
at 7:48 PM CST
Updated: Tuesday, 1 February 2005 7:49 PM CST
